Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Me Too, Me Too

You don't need to tell me twice to talk about myself! My name is Jen and I am fat. Scratch that, I am "a person of size" (that's what they call me in the airline regulations that require fat people to buy two seats). I am 36 years old, 5'9" and yesterday I weighed in at a whopping 288 pounds!!! (Do I win something for being the heaviest?!). Although, I think it's really more like 283 since I've been very bad at taking my high blood pressure medication that makes me pee a lot. (I know, overshare). I figure being under 200 is likely a pipe dream, but I'd like to be quite a bit farther away from 300. I did pass the 300 mark with both my pregnancies (pregnant at 275, delivered at 305) and it wasn't pretty.

I have been overweight since . . . hmm, well since forever. I crossed that 200 lb line when I was 14 years old ladies, and have not looked back since. My lowest adult weight was about 220 in college, I weighed 255 when I got married. I am active, I rarely drink pop and can usually pass up sweets. My downfall--basic overeating. I LOVE FOOD! I just plain eat too much of anything, healthy or otherwise. Oh, and I like fat too. Onion rings vs. dessert = onion rings hands down. And although I don't like being fat, I like myself and I love my life (most days). That combined with having no idea what it feels like to be thin means that I'm generally just not that motivated to do what I know I need to do. So, maybe y'all can help me because it's starting to catch up with my health in my blood pressure and knees.

Okay, so the rest of my life in a nutshell. I have two boys (3 and 6) and my husband is a camp director here in Michigan. We live on site and have acres and acres of trails and lakes and pasture and forest--you'd think I'd be all thin from romping around camp--but you've never visited the dining hall, where it's all you can eat every day. As food and housing is part of my husband's benefits package, I'm reluctant to stop going there--no shopping, cooking, cleaning or dishes is REALLY hard to pass up. So, I'm hoping that having some accountability here will help me stick wise dining hall choices--othewise I'm going to have to start shopping and cooking again. I saw a nutritionist once for a few months and lost 30 pounds, then I moved to camp and gained it back. I'm sure I can do this again. I digress, where was I? Oh, I work part time from home. I love to read, write, play the violin and swim (hard to convince myself to do when it's 7 degrees and snowing out, but I'm getting better). I have another blog where I like to write, so I'll stop blabbing on here--you can read my babbling there: http://www.image-jen.blogspot.com/ I avoid the camera as well and destroy all really bad shots, but if I find one, I'll post a pic too. Later.

3 comments:

  1. I didn't realize you weren't cooking anymore! You're the best cook ever! (I only know b/c Ethan's left-overs always looked delicious. :)

    If it weren't for the health I probably wouldn't care about losing weight, either. Hopefully we'll make some doctors happy. :)

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  2. This was fascinating. I can imagine gaining weight having a dining hall at your service. But it must be so pretty where you are! I took violin in middle school and really would like to pick it up again. It is a time and money issue. Thanks for sharing!

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  3. Denise, I was worried too, since I do love to cook--but the beauty of it is that I cook only when I want to, and usually on the weekends since camp schedule is irregular. It's a good balance, I can really still enjoy cooking without it becoming a drudgery.

    Christy, you should check into local orchestras--even some of the professional/semi-professional ones host a sort of community orchestra affiliate where anyone who wants to can show up once a week to play together, work on some music and even play a concert a couple times a year. When we were in NC, I joined a amatuer/professional orchestra (2nd violin in the back) and I hadn't been in an orchestra since middle school. It was a huge challenge, but very fun and just something for me. Hopefully I'll do something like it again here.

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